In March 2021, I had a knee replacement done and if it weren’t for my sister’s, I don’t know what I would have done. They came from hundreds of KMs away to spend 10 days with me to make sure my recovery was going well. They cooked, cleaned, and helped me get out of the chair (ha, ha) and it was great to have them there. To be clear, when I refer to my sisters, I include Grace who was married to my brother Charlie.
When you have a group of women all over 50 years old, it can be quite entertaining. One night, my sister Kathy went upstairs to take a bath, she had one foot in the tub and couldn’t remember if she was getting in or out of the tub. She called downstairs, “Abby, was I getting in or out of the tub?” Abby called back, saying “I’ll be right there.” As she was walking up the stairs and reached the landing, she got a little disoriented and couldn’t remember if she was going up or down the stairs. She then called out to Grace, “Grace, was I going up or down the stairs, I can’t remember?” Grace started to laugh, shaking her head, and said to herself, “I hope I don’t get that forgetful” and knocked on wood for luck. She then said to Abby, “I’ll be right there after I see who’s at the door.”
Now this little story was just a joke, but I do have funny stories about my sisters.
When I was six years old and my parents were out of town, my sister Abby was taking me out snowmobiling, it had snowed heavily the night before, so the snowmobile was buried in the snow. Abby started up the snowmobile and when she gave it a little gas, the track was stuck and wouldn’t move. She had me sit in on the snowmobile to give it gas so she could go behind and lift the track out of the snow so we could clear it. When she “thought” she had the snowmobile lifted enough, she told me to give it some gas. The track of the snowmobile was still on the ground and the snowmobile took off. As a scared little girl, I squeezed the handles even tighter, going faster and faster, until I ran right into my brother Charlie’s car.
This little stunt put me in the hospital, and I still have a scar over my left eye. Abby felt bad, so she brought me a bag of licorice to the hospital while Charlie was mad and only cared that I had wrecked his car.
Oh, the good old days of NO HELMETS.
Let me tell you about another incident from my childhood that left me scar, figuratively that is. My sister Crystal, who is two years older than me, had quite a little temper. We were 8 and 10 years old, and we were sitting at the dinner table one night, when from out of nowhere, she grabs her fork and throws it straight at me, sticking in my forehead. Now, she claims I was kicking her under the table, but I don’t remember that. This instance has permanently traumatized me and to this day, I won’t allow forks in my house, everything is eaten with a spoon (okay, the last bit isn’t true, but she did throw a fork at me which stuck in my forehead).
I could have used a helmet then too!
Those of you who have sisters, or even really close girlfriends, you know that sometimes when we get together, we can be a little catty or dare I say ‘bitchy.’ One day when we were having one of these conversations (I can’t actually remember what or who we were talking about), my sister Kathy claimed we were being “facetious”, it didn’t make sense in the context of what we were talking about, so we asked her what she meant by that. Kathy made this angry face and put her hands up like they were claws and repeated the word ‘facetious’ with a menacing voice. We started laughing, saying that’s not what facetious means, and explained that facetious means to joke inappropriately. She insisted that the word facetious, sounds mean, not funny. We all had such a good laugh and now refer to anyone being mean or catty as being ‘facetious.’
Be careful of what you say around your sisters, they will never let you forget it.
Anyone who knows me knows that I have an inappropriate sense of humour. Several years ago, my sister-in-law Grace’s mother had passed, she was one of the sweetest people you have ever met, and she was loved dearly. My sister-in-law Darlene, who is married to my brother Tom, went over to pay her respects, and brought Grace a pineapple (whole, not cut up on a platter), she explained that she thought Grace would get desserts, food and flowers from the people who would stop by. A pineapple? Really, that was the best you could do. Grace was hurt and insulted by this and was telling me about it on the phone, I felt bad, the gesture by Darlene lacked all empathy.
I wasn’t able to make it back home for the funeral, but my sister Abby went, so I asked her to pick up a coconut and bring it to Grace for me. I knew that Grace would understand that I was making a dig at Darlene, not that I was unsympathetic to her loss and hoped that she would get a little bit of a laugh out of it, which I think she did (I really, really hope she did).
I love this group of ladies more than I can express. They put up with a lot from me (my quirky, inappropriate, facetious sense of humour) but it is all said and done with a sprinkle of love.
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